Thelonius Monster's Sky-High Fly Pie

This is one of my new favorite kids books... 

when you read them 10 times a day,

 its nice to have one you actually enjoy alright? 

.....totally normal. 

THELONIOUS MONSTER'S SKY-HIGH FLY PIE 

A revolting rhyme by JUDY SIERRA 

with delicious drawings (not included in this blog) by EDWARD KOREN 

THELONIOUS MONSTER 

once swallowed a FLY,

and decided that flies would taste GRAND in a P I E 

that silly guy! 

THELONIOUS urgently 

e-mailed a spider. 

He wanted advice from a savvy insider. 

"You'll need something sticky" was her reply. "To catch a FLY" 

THELONIOUS MONSTER concocted a goo

of molasses and sugar and honey and glue, 

and he rolled out a crust of astonishing S I Z E 

Now for the flies...  

THELONIOUS stelthily followed 
                         a horse 
                       and a dog 
                                            and a cat 
                                       and a cow
                                                      ... and of course, 

he dived in a Dumpster, 

he circled a sewer, 

and spent several hours near 

a pile of manure

He lured H U N D R E D S and 

T H O U S A N D S 

of succulent flies, 

and their footsies all stuck 

to his fly-catching pie. 

THELONIOUS MONSTER addressed invitations 

to all his disgusting-est friends and relations 

PLEASE COME TO MY MANSION 

THIS SUNDAY FOR PIE. 

DON'T WEAR A TIE. 

On Sunday, THELONIOUS OPENED THE DOOR 

To ELENENTEEN  ravenous MONSTERS

or more-----  

his aunties

his uncles

his cousins

his chums

 "How it glistens!" they shouted "And listen - it hums!" 

It's the tunefullest pie that has ever been made. 

we shall march to the buzz 

in a m o n s t e r parade."

As they picked up their forks 

            and circled the room. 

                       the pie full of flies lifted off with a 

                                                      V O O M.  

UP, UP the staircase 

if whirred and it whined 

with all of the monsters galumphing behind. 

it WHIZZED to the sky. 

bye-bey fly pie. 

THELONIOUS MONSTER 

started to cry. 

"Now NO one will taste my 

SENSATIONAL pie." 

(for though it has taken him so long to make it the monster had somehow forgotten to bake it.)

But then, by a stroke of INCREDIBLE luck 

in the sky all the flies' little feet came unstuck. 

When the pie FELL 

to the earth in a 

HUGE 

cloud 

of dust, 

E L E V E N T E E N monsters 

devoured the crust. 

His creepiest cousin declared with a Roar, 

"A DESERT LIKE THIS NEVER EXISTED BEFORE-- 

A PIE THAT COULD SPARKLE, COULD SING, AND COULD SOAR. 

IT'S DESPICABLY SWEET 

(With a slight hint of fly) 

YOU'RE A FABULOUS COOK! 

YOU'RE A WONDERFUL GUY!"  

"wE lOvE yOUr PIE!" 

____________________ 

... Wasn't that great? 

                                           ..... wasn't it? 

Yeah. 

I know.